south park

Review: Halloween Wars

OK, Food Network has flooded the airwaves with yet another dessert competition, Halloween Wars.  Here’s what they say about it:

The four episode competition series places five teams, comprised of cake decorators, HalloweenWars 300x225 Food Network Haunts October With New Series ‘Halloween Wars’candy makers and pumpkin carvers, working in unison to create the ultimate Halloween themed display. One team is eliminated each week, with the winner taking home $50,000.  Hosted by Justin Willman (magician Justin Kredible who also hosts Cupcake Wars), and including renowned cake decorator Shinmin Li and Hollywood conceptual artist Miles Teves on the judging panel, the competitors must battle it out to prove who is the best, all the while scaring viewers pants off with some of the most amazing horror tales through their cake, candy and pumpkins.

I will say this, the fact that Halloween Wars is a seasonal show centered around a day pseudonymous with sweets makes it better than any other sugar cook-off in history.  In fact, had we not already had nine million dessert contests shoved down our metaphorical throats I might have really enjoyed this.  However, words simply cannot do justice to the exhale of frustration that erupted from me as a judge actually critiqued a cake-monster for not having enough fangs.  Seriously?

If you are a fan of cookie cutter sugar shows enjoy.  I have lost my patience with this kind of programing.  I could handle this lack of creativity from producers if they weren’t all so damned boring.  Dessert oriented shows can be broken down into two categories the good (anything including Duff Goldman) and the wretched (everything else).

Halloween Wars airs Sundays 9/8 Central on the Food Network.  I’ll be watching the NFL game until Iron Chef returns, flipping over to South Park reruns during the commercials of course.  I’m not a barbarian.

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Review: Creme Fraiche – South Park S14 EP14

A friend of mine hipped me to the fact that the guys at South Park had done an episode about foodies and cheflebrities.  Well, I had to check that out.

Trey Parker (left) and Matt Stone (right)Now I don’t get a chance to talk about South Park here (for obvious reasons) but it is to this day some of the best television ever.  Creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone put truth ahead of agenda and that is so refreshing in this day and age.  Unlike what the mainstream media tells us life is not just Demorcrap or Repugnantcan.

Depending on the political environment at the time America is 30% to 33% Repub, 25% to 28% Demo and the rest is neither.  There are more independents than members of either party – right now there are more Indies than both parties combined.   South Park is the only place in the media that gets that.  This nation would be better off with a Parker/Stone White House than anything any political party can put together.

That’s because South Park doesn’t pull punches.  They don’t care how much it hurts they tell the truth.  As it turns out Trey Parker is a foodie and a huge Food Network fan so he has long wanted to do an episode making fun of, well, himself.  You see, even when hacking on themselves these guys are honest.

Stan’s dad Randy Marsh has a problem; he’s addicted to porn – food porn.  Sharon Marsh calls Food Network the “no no channel” and forbids her South Parkian Guy Fierihusband from watching it.  This is partly because the kids do not like the flavorful, non-processed foods it inspires Randy to prepare for the family and partly because Randy can’t stop molesting himself whenever it’s on.  Sharon’s distress over Randy’s “addiction” leads her to focus more on herself including a new work-out regime centered around a silver-tongued Shake Weight that quickly turns into a sordid affair.  Who hasn’t lived this exact same scenario?

The episode is ripe with ample amounts of innuendo, classic South Parkian celebrity impressions (that means they make no attempt to actually sound like them) and most importantly an accurate indictment of pop culture.  It is also hysterically funny especially with the over-emphasis on culinary words.  South Park is the only comedy in TV history that did not go down hill as soon as they started being preachy.  Nope South Park actually got better.

Check out Trey and Matt’s commentary on the episode below and then go watch the full episode for FREE from their web site.  But be forewarned, when I say “full” episode there are none of those hypocritical bleeps.  It’s full-frontal psychological nudity.

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Stuart in 80 Words or Less

Stuart is a celebrity chef, food activist and award-winning food writer. He penned the cookbooks Third Coast Cuisine: Recipes of the Gulf of Mexico, No Sides Needed: 34 Recipes To Simplify Life and Amigeauxs - Mexican/Creole Fusion Cuisine. He hosts two Internet cooking shows "Everyday Gourmet" and "Little Grill Big Flavor." His recipes have been featured in Current, Lagniappe, Southern Tailgater, The Kitchen Hotline and on the Cooking Channel.

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Stuart’s Honors & Awards

2015 1st Place Luck of the Irish Cook-off
2015 4th Place Downtown Cajun Cook-off
2015 2nd Place Fins' Wings & Chili Cook-off
2014 2015 4th Place LA Gumbo Cook-off
2012 Taste Award nominee for best chef (web)
2012 Finalist in the Safeway Next Chef Contest
2011 Taste Award Nominee for Little Grill Big Flavor
2011, 12 Member: Council of Media Tastemakers
2011 Judge: 29th Chef's of the Coast Cook-off
2011 Judge: Dauphin Island Wing Cook-off
2011 Cooking Channel Perfect 3 Recipe Finalist
2011 Judge: Dauphin Island Gumbo Cook-off
2011 Culinary Hall of Fame Member
2010 Tasty Awards Judge
2010 Judge: Bayou La Batre Gumbo Cook-off
2010 Gourmand World Cookbook Award Nominee
2010 Chef2Chef Top 10 Best Food Blogs
2010 Denay's Top 10 Best Food Blogs
2009 2nd Place Bay Area Food Bank Chef Challenge
2008 Tava: Discovery Contest Runner-up


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